Monday Morning Armchair Quarterback, Regular Season, Week 2 #football #funny @meganslayer

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Who is going to beat the Bengals? Apparently the Ravens and the Texans. Oy…’tis been a tough week for the Bengal fans. At least we weren’t shut out of the second game. Still, it’s a bit painful.

So to easy my pain, how about the funny quotes of the week? These are all honorable mentions because so I can gather the second week quotes! 🙂 Next week…it’s game on. (I hope.)

Let’s get started.

“Came into the kiss.” 

Interesting.

“They pounded him.”

Maybe that’s what he wanted.

“Applying the pressure.”

Of course. They’re pounding him.

“Bang the round.”

So he’s part of a group getting pounding…gotcha.

Now for the Quotes from Week 2. Oh boy. Those sports casters really need to think before they speak. 

“They’ll rush three and drop eight so they’ll clog up the middle.”

Or it’s just a group thing and strategy.

“Going right after him in the slot.”

Hope they cleaned up after each other.

“He blew everyone away.”

Because he’s great in that slot.

“The tight end brought in from Indy.”

Sounds like he was a special order.

“Spread wide and to the right”

For those who need more direction for their play.

“He doesn’t go out ad could go all the way”

Isn’t that the point?

Now for the Doozy of the Week. There is always one quote that just…blows the mind. This one is a real ringer. 

“He’s a load inside.”

Yes, yes he is. He’s all man and I’m glad you noticed. Nothing like an observant commentator.

~ ~ ~

Side notes:

  • Someone explain to me the infatuation Collinsworth has with butts. He loves to draw on butts.
  • Why is Collinsworth obsessed with saying “Keeping Brady clean”? Will he wilt if he gets dirty? Inquiring minds want to know.
  • Oh and four interceptions for Dalton during the Ravens game. Good job. At least he didn’t have any during the Texans game and they were only at a four point deficit.

**Here’s to a good season, less CTE, more great plays and lots of fun! Oh, and WHO DEY!**

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Andy Dalton, #14, Quarterback for the Cincinnati Bengals
By Melissa Batson (Own work) [CC-BY-SA-3.0
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Monday Morning Armchair Quarterback, Regular Season, Week 1 #football #funny @meganslayer

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This is the first week of the regular season and whoopie!! Football!! I’m excited and a little nervous. Hey, the first time is always nerve-wracking. Hehe.

Now that the season has started, here are the remainder preseason quotes. These are all honorable mentions because so I can gather the official first week quotes! 🙂 Next week…it’s game on.

Let’s get started.

“Can’t lead with tight ends.” 

Who says?

“Immensely gifted.”

Well, if he’s one of those tight ends…I want to see for myself.

“He’s a pocket pleaser.”

Yeah, we need to see this one…for study.

“Really deep in the receiver position.”

He’s aiming to please.

“Uneven match up.”

Depends on how you look at it.

“Came with a big stick”

For those tight ends.

“They got a two tight end set.”

For the guy with the big stick.

“A whole lot of man.”

That’s one way of describing him. Hehehe.

~ ~ ~

Well, those are the quotes from the  rest week.

Here’s to a good season, less CTE, more great plays and lots of fun! Oh, and WHO DEY!

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Andy Dalton, #14, Quarterback for the Cincinnati Bengals
By Melissa Batson (Own work) [CC-BY-SA-3.0

Monday Morning Armchair Quarterback, Preseason Week 3 #football #funny @meganslayer

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It’s high time the season gets started. I’m all for preseason, but come on. I need the regular season to get here! It’s time.  Until I get my way, it’s time for the preseason quotes. There were a few goodies from the second week that didn’t quite make the cut last time around, but they’re here now! Let’s get started.

“Looks more powerful coming forward.” 

Is that like 3-D…it’s coming right at you?

“Shootin’ the gaps.”

Better to aim at them, than around them.

“I see more of his power.”

Now that he’s here, yep, you can see more of his…er…power.

“Check the release times.”

He’s on a timer? Interesting. Or very BDSM-y. 🙂

“A lot to clean up.”

Well, if he’s all messy, then it goes without saying.

Now for those wonderful quotes this week from the various preseason games. You won’t want to miss these.

“Get deep because they can see more.”

Better than shallow and unsatisfied.

“Powerful lower body.”

If he’s going to get deep, then he’d better be powerful.

“He didn’t get as much as he wants.”

I’m sure he can find satisfaction.

“Will give him as much as he can handle.”

See? They’re pacing him.

“Short underneath.”

Nope. Just a bad camera angle.

“Sack Master.”

See? I told you it was just a bad camera angle.

And now for the Doozy of the Week…this is the one that had me scratching my head the longest or was just so far out there…I couldn’t believe it. Ready?

“Take a little bit and drop it in over the top.”

Sounds like a puppy pile to me, but might be fun.

~ ~ ~

Well, those are the quotes from the third week of the madness.

Here’s to a good season, less CTE, more great plays and lots of fun! Oh, and WHO DEY!

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Andy Dalton, #14, Quarterback for the Cincinnati Bengals
By Melissa Batson (Own work) [CC-BY-SA-3.0

Monday Morning Armchair Quarterback ~ Preseason, Week 2 #football @meganslayer

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Still haven’t seen my Bengals this season, but it won’t be long before I do. I’ll get there.  Until then, it’s time for the preseason quotes. There were a few goodies from the first week that didn’t quite make the cut last time around, but they’re here now! Let’s get started.

“He’s as fast as they come.” 

Which is why he’s a favorite.

“From the money pocket.”

He moved fast, which is why he found that money pocket so fast.

“A wobbly one.”

He swings low, sweet chariot.

“Tight splits.”

Hmm…bring lube.

“Playing with his hands.”

Got to work in those tight splits somehow.

Now for those wonderful quotes this week from the various preseason games. You won’t want to miss these.

“Cannot have penetration in the backfield”

He wants it all in the front field.

“Gotta slide and get your body around it.”

We’re back to those tight splits, eh? Sounds more like wrestling.

“We gotta check that and get the ball tucked away so it doesn’t get out.”

If he’s the guy who is swinging low, then yeah, you might want to tuck that back in.

“Undersized but has a little wiggle to him.”

He’s popular…

“We’ve got to pick it up; they’ve had their way with us for too long.”

Sure do if you want to keep things even.

“A lot of length on their line.”

If it’s a suck line, then it might be worth it. Gotta try every one.

And now for the Doozy of the Week…this is the one that had me scratching my head the longest or was just so far out there…I couldn’t believe it. Ready?

“Loves to use tight ends in the offense.”

Well, if there are lines and lengths, then you’ve got to use them as an offense. Got to have something between you and the rest of the team.

Well, those are the first week of the madness. Technically the second week, but it’s the first week of full action. Here’s to a good season, less CTE, more great plays and lots of fun! Oh, and WHO DEY!

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Andy Dalton, #14, Quarterback for the Cincinnati Bengals
By Melissa Batson (Own work) [CC-BY-SA-3.0

Friday Flirts ~ Third and Long by @MeganSlayer #football #mf #romance #eroticromance #flirt

FRIDAY FLIRT BANNER

Third and Long by Megan Slayer

Contemporary Erotic Interracial Football Romance

Short Story

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Rules are meant to be broken, especially when your back is against the wall.

Nico Thunder rules the field. As the quarterback of the Bearcats, he knows what he wants and takes it. There’s one exception. Kaja Wright makes him hot in all the right places, but she’s off limits. The rule states no interoffice dating. He can’t get her out of his mind.

He’s been in sticky situations before. Can he get out of this third-and long-situation, or will he be forced to punt before he finds his heart’s delight?

This 6,500 word erotic short story features scenes of interracial heterosexual sex.

This book has been re-edited from the first edition and re-issued in this edition.

Get your copy wherever ebooks are sold: https://books2read.com/u/m2XB0G

Amazon Japan: https://www.amazon.co.jp/dp/B01N4MSD06/

Amazon.Co.uk : https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B01N4MSD06/

Amazon.de: https://www.amazon.de/dp/B01N4MSD06/

Amazon.com.au : https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B01N4MSD06/

Excerpt:

©Megan Slayer, 2017,  All Rights Reserved

She’d never admit the truth out loud, but she’d been drawn to him since the moment he’d been traded to the team. From his inky black hair and his deep brown eyes, down his chiseled torso to his sculpted legs and feet, she wanted to caress him. What would it feel like to lie beside him in bed and discuss football plays? She bit back the urge to chuckle. Yes, she was that girl. She ate, breathed, and slept football. But sleeping with the players wasn’t part of the game.

Still, Nico was hot and could be worth the trouble.

Maybe.

“Then what is your problem?” She shrugged away from him and folded her arms. “Something set you off.”

“That asshole touching you and being a dick. That’s what set me off. He thinks he owns every female he comes in contact with and can treat them like shit. I’m sorry. I have a problem with that.” Nico’s whisper became strained.

“Then…thank you.” She rubbed her bare arms. She’d had to protect herself for so long that she forgot what if felt like to have someone step in. She wished she had on something more than a cocktail dress.

“I’ve also been trying all year to get you to talk to me. I’ve stayed out of trouble. Other than the rule about dating staff, what do you have against me?”