Monday Morning Armchair Quarterback ~ Week 5 ~ Survival of the Fittest…

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Hmm…Stafford got benched. Smith, Peyton Manning and Kaepernick are looking at down seasons. Vick’s not looking so slick. The Falcons and the Bengals are 5-0, but that won’t last forever. Oh and the Browns won in a last minute thriller. Considering how far down they were, yeah, that was thrilling. Thought the Bengals were going to blow it and I’m not going to lie, the Seahawks made them work for that win.

But I digress…and you came here for the funny quotes. Are you ready? Here are the Honorable Mentions:

“Comin’ inside.”

Better than on the outside–unless you’re into that.

“Opens himself up to it.”

He’s willing to try coming outside.

“Gone to some really dark places.”

Maybe he needed to in order to be free and heal.

“It somehow squeezes through.”

Huh. The skinny guy from last week must’ve got the blue pills to work. 

“He took it deep.”

After the squeezing and going to dark places, I’d assume so. Probably had to.

Ahem… Back to the point…. 

Now for those quotes of the week. It always amazes me what’s said on television. 

“Multiple tight ends.”

Better selection. 

“Getting his big paws around him.”

They like that kind of wrestling. 

“When you have them that wide open, you have to hit them.”

Spoken like a true master blaster. 

“Hold, hold, hold and then dump.”

Is this a suggestion for the bedroom or the bathroom? 

“Great penetration by the line.”

Orgy time!

“Really excited about these tight ends.”

Now that sounds like a discussion for the strip club. 

“Grinds it in.”

See? I mentioned the strip club. This smacks of Magic Mike.

Smacks… hee hee hee!

“Gets sucked back inside.”

Muwhahahaha! They didn’t want to let go!

And now for that Doozy of the Week. It’s fun, indeed!

“Didn’t give him a lot of room to fit that one in.”

But isn’t that what they like? Tight holes? Fitting it in snuggly? I’d think so. 

Thanks for reading and checking out my thoughts on the games. I’ve got release news and cover art to post this week, so stay tuned!!

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Andy Dalton, #14, Quarterback for the Cincinnati Bengals
By Melissa Batson (Own work) [CC-BY-SA-3.0
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